Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Did Muhammad Ali ask Dundee to cut his gloves off before Eddie Futch stopped the fight in Thrilla in Manila?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for fakery

Night Owls More Impulsive Than Morning Larks - Neuroscience News

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

What are the psychological reasons behind an extreme obsession with another human being?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Harvey Weinstein Won’t Testify In His Own Defense In NYC Sex Crimes Retrial; Jury Deliberations May Start Tuesday - Deadline

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t cotton to rapists

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

How is cultural invasion being carried out by Bollywood?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t buy bullshit

Would you let your partner cheat on you every now and again?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I can read

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I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What is the best/cute/funny/playful chat/conversation between brother and sister?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I can count

Fog of trade war hangs over economy, but the Fed still has to make a forecast. Here’s what it’s faces. - MarketWatch

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Why the American Diet Is So Deadly? A Silent Killer Quietly Harming Millions - Indian Defence Review

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

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I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I see through liars

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Earth’s Magnetic Field Failed 41,000 Years Ago – The Catastrophic Event That Altered Human Evolution Forever - Indian Defence Review

I have a reading level above third grade

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I actually pay taxes

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”